


Watch and Wait

by missmuffet



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Blood, Canon-Typical Violence, Gen, Minor Character Death, Titans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-09
Updated: 2013-09-09
Packaged: 2017-12-26 01:40:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/960079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missmuffet/pseuds/missmuffet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Irvin assumed the position in the Scouting Legion, he instilled one rule to their ranks. One commandment that above all, must all always be upheld.</p>
<p>No mourning on the battlefield.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Watch and Wait

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by the Eren I RP with on tumblr (red-lotus-arrow) from my Hanji account (thewildhollowhunt).  
> Indeed this explains the reason behind her name so perfectly.
> 
> Canon typical violence. Titans eat people.

There had been a reason she had tried to brace him for this. Her only regret was that she hadn’t thought of the worse, still had that shred of optimism that that things wouldn’t be as bad as he imagined it. Hanji had seen the damage first hand after all. She didn’t expect that Eren had seen worse. 

"Is that…" Just a few steps behind her and Hanji couldn’t help but cringe at the way his voice shook. How he went from panting from exertion, to completely breathless, sucking in air futilely in a mere instant. "Is that — that’s — no, no…"

What few had remained of their initial group of twenty had cleared away the majority of the Titans in the district. While they had split into groups from there, one manning the breach leading to the outside, the other managing the breach on the other end. Irvin and Levi headed each group, and Hanji had grabbed Eren by the hand and told him to run as fast as they could. They wouldn’t have long to reach his house and even less time to identify whatever they needed to retrieve. Hanji had seen the shambles of this area first hand years ago, but she had never dared to think she would meet someone who once lived within the crumbled houses or knew the identity of those caught beneath the boulder sized rubble. What she expected even less was the pile of white and gray that laid on top of ruined home. At first, Hanji had disregarded it as nothing more than sticks and pieces of the housing support, but when Eren shoved past her so hard that she fell to the ground, Hanji could have nearly puked at the thought of what those sticks were.

Who they once were.

"Oh god…! Oh god…" Eren let out a noise not unlike his Titan’s roar. A strangled sound caught between a scream and sob as he scrambled up the pile of wood to cradle the skeleton. Half a skeleton. Hanji pushed herself off of the ground but didn’t dare to look any further. This would be her second regret; turning her back on the boy while he screamed his sorrows. "H-Hanji, Hanji please," he managed to choke out by the time his voice had quieted. "We need to bring her back, I d-don’t want her to stay so far way like this, out with those monsters." Nature was nothing but cruel. No sooner had Eren let out those words was there another scream, the sound of wood being thrown away at a great force. 

Spinning around, she barely caught sight of the ten meter class Titan that had been lurking somewhere in the rubble before she reacted. Body acting on autopilot, the trigger moving far too slowly, rocketing into the air in what seemed like slow motion. A wet, gurgling sound, and she already knew it was too late by the time she brought her swords down into the nape of its neck. The Titan dropped, Eren still caught in its mouth when it hit the ground, his body crunching. Hanji wasn’t sure if the next scream was hers or his. “Eren! Eren!” She jumped off the Titan’s shoulders, pried the monster’s mouth open with disgusting ease and pulled the other soldier out.

No older than fifteen and his body already crushed, nearly into two halves. His breath coming fast, short, choking breathes. Lungs crushed, no doubt, blood escaping from his stomach and shoulder following the curve of his bite. She fumbled to remove her cloak, dropped to her knees beside him and fasten it around as much as she could, as tightly as possible. “Eren, Eren! Open your eyes, **please** —! Don’t you want to see your friends when we get back?” Still breathing, but eyes closed. Perhaps he had knocked his head from the impact. “EREN!” she shouted, throat stinging from the efforts. “D-didn’t you want to see the world outside?” Hanji chokes, pulls the boy into a sitting positions and shakes him. Between the pain and perhaps an old dream, his eyes flutter open.

_"Mom?"_ Hanji breaks. Eyes burn at the memory of so many other deaths like this, so many chances to save a soldier that she had failed. But never before had she seen a mistaken identity like this. She has broken the gravest of all the rules, allowed another to die because of it. ** _No mourning on the battlefield._ ** "Mom? Is that you?" he goes on, "I — I can’t see anything, my whole body hurts —! _I’m scared_ , please…”

"Yes, Eren, I’m right here." Never one for lying before this, but she can’t stop herself from that or from pulling the boy against her chest, wrapping him in her arms and cradling. If he notices the tears following onto his body, he says nothing, only twitches his lips into a faint smile. "Mommy’s got you," she assures as steadily as she can. Rocks him like a baby.

"Why is it so dark? I can’t see you right…"

The lie becomes so effortless, so desperate. She doesn’t think anymore. Just acts. “Nighttime. You — you were having a nightmare. But everything is going. _You’re going to be okay._ I promise.” Shifting, Hanji reached out to brush his hair back. “You’re… falling asleep, that’s all. Once you go to sleep, everything will be okay. You’re not going to hurt ever again.”

"I’m not tired," he rasped weakly. 

"I’ll sing you a lullaby, then. One th-that my mother used to sing to me. _Hush l-little baby… don’t say a word, mama’s gonna buy you a mocking bird….”_ His chest stops moving long before the nursery rhyme ends, but all she can do is grip him tighter until she finishes, then buries her face into the crook of his neck and sobs. 

When Irvin assumed the position in the Scouting Legion, he instilled one rule to their ranks. One commandment that above all, must all always be upheld.   
  
**No mourning on the battlefield.  
  
 **No mourning on the battlefield.**  
  
 **No mourning on the battlefield.****   



End file.
